If your goal is too small, sometimes you simply aren’t motivated enough to fire on all cylinders (eg you need a bigger game to play!)
OR you may need a smaller game to play to avoid overwhelm or the feeling you'll never get there.
So, either make the game smaller or identify important milestones along the way and target those.
OR you may need to start doing the opposite of what you’ve been doing. Don’t laugh at this one. It can work. Ask yourself what would happen or what would you feel?
If nothing else, it’s a creative exercise and sometimes a 180 or 90 degree turn is what’s most needed.
Maybe you don't really want the goal even though you think you do. Perhaps you have a goal in mind but it’s actually a “should” goal vs. a “want” goal and so you don’t get very far with it.
The trick is to work on “want” goals or to shift the “should” into a “want.” “Should” goals are likely to derail you. “Want” goals usually keep you motivated.
You may need a very different goal. A coach can help you tease out what matters most to you!
OR your goal may need a different strategy (there are many ways to cause an outcome; these are called strategies).
It's a skill to find the most appealing and effective strategy that gets you from point A to point B without going through point Z.
So if you aren't making progress with your goal(s), consider using a different approach or strategy instead.
You may also be concerned about perceived loss or consequences.
Success can be stressful because you are replacing the old you (the known and the familiar) with something else. Welcome to evolution!
Even if everything is going to be terrific when you reach your goal, the fear of losing something else can be more than enough to keep you stuck in the present.
Maybe your environments are not properly set up to support your goal? To give you the 24/7 support you need?
Environments include family, friends, networks, emotional environments, memes/concepts, paradigms, paradoxes, creative stimulation, performance support (like a coach), what we eat (for the energy we need) and how clean our energy is.
Maybe your goal is not a clear enough expression of your true values. Your body slows/shuts down when your goals aren’t aligned with your internal values.
Work on your top 5 values and find the connection between the goal you are stuck on and the value that it expresses.
Questions to ask yourself…
* Do you know why you’re stuck?
* What goal would you rather work on?
* Do you sometimes get stuck when you’re this close to reaching a goal?
* Do you need a supportive kick in the pants?
* What could possibly “un-stick” you in the next 10 minutes?
* How much longer are you willing to be stuck on this?
* What else could you try?
You may need time to figure out what big changes you could make in your life in order to reach your goal(s) more easily,
Do NOT be afraid to pick another goal if you aren't getting anywhere. Goals are meant to be exciting to reach.
If you find yourself resisting, labouring, complaining or just not into it, find another goal or develop another strategy that IS self-motivating.
Thomas Leonard's 12 Rules of Effective Goal Setting
1 Personal
Goals that express values are more easily reached (eg meaningful)
2. Clean
How clean is your motivation behind the goal (eg are you moving towards or away)
3. Safe Enough
Is the risk within your comfort threshold? (eg a comfortable stretch)
4. Integrated
Are the actions needed a natural part of your day? (eg practicle versus conceptual)
5. Affordable
Do you have the time/money for this goal right now? (eg do-able)
6. Energizing
Does this goal give you juice or tire you?
7. Measureable
What are the measures, whether tangible or intangible?
8. Trackable
How can you track your progress?
9. Sourced
Have you really thought this goal through
10. Beneficial
How much will you really benefit from this goal?
11. Positioning
When reached, what will you be positioned to accomplish next?
12. Sustainable
How long will the benefits last when you reach this goal? |
